Training

May 8th, 2008Blog1 comment

I’m training to beat Dave up. This is not going to be easy.

To this end I have added push-ups, pull-ups, and crunches to my workouts. I am also picking fights with various life forms, working my way up on the food chain from small to large. I powerbombed a squirrel yesterday. That was really easy.

A mutual friend recommended that since I’m a fairly proficient runner, I should adopt “hit and run” tactics. Hit him, then run away and then hit him again. Try to aim for flashing spots on his body since those are “weak points” where hitting him will do massive damage.

I think in a few months I should be good to go.

I booked a flight for an NYC trip next month. This time I’m going to try out Virgin America.

I really hate flying. I don’t like being trapped in a metal cylinder with other people who may be carrying airborne diseases. Plus it takes forever to get there, and once you get there you’re all desiccated and irritated. It always takes me the rest of the day to recuperate.

Virgin America has a lot of special features and quirks though. Like you can always march up to a minibar and grab snacks. And there’s mood lighting and a disco ball. We’ll see how it goes.

Late to the Party

May 7th, 2008Blog0 comments

I know I’m late with these, but here they are:

Barack Obama Remembered Your Birthday.

Hillary never refills the Brita.

The Rules

May 7th, 2008Blog0 comments

If you can’t win fair and square, you don’t deserve to win.

This goes for everybody: Democrats and Republicans. People that play on Xbox live. Scrabulous.

One thing that America purports as part of its dream is fairness — “talk is cheap”, actions matter. It makes the claim that you will get a fair shot when you step up to the plate.

In reality this is not so sound. Some people are born with spina bifida. Some people are born in the ghetto. Some people have parents that get drunk and knock their teeth out. Some people nepotize the incompetent into positions of power.

But if you try to “game” the rules, if you have to cheat to win, you don’t deserve to win.

Even if you’re doing it for a good cause. Even if you’re doing it “for America”. Especially if you’re doing it for your children.

Forensics

May 6th, 2008Blog0 comments

I think that two major components of writing are A) Coming up with something interesting to say, and B) Saying that thing in an interesting way. Some people are good at item A but not B and vice-versa. The key is to be great at both.

If you were a Dungeons and Dragons character, item A would be determined by your intelligence — what you know; item B by your wisdom — your ability to execute upon that knowledge. You want 18s in both attributes, and you want to buff them with rings or amulets if you got ‘em.

I’m always working on item A. I love learning new things.

Right now I’m studying forensics and police procedure for a new project. I just love history and facts and factoids and technical doo-dads. I can’t get enough of this stuff.

I think it’s something that spawned in me early in childhood. I don’t know when it happened, but it’s been with me ever since.

I just love newness. Finding things out and tying them together with what I already know. It makes the world shiny and reborn.

The American Dream

May 5th, 2008Blog2 comments

OK — after playing GTA 4 for a few hours, here is my mini-review: It’s my favoritest video game of all time. This may sound like hyperbole — and it is — but when I compare the user experience to my other favorite games (Halo, even Fallout 1/2), GTA 4 comes out on top.

Why? I’m already a fan of the GTA series and it evolves that gameplay. It gives you a sandbox world that is so detailed and vibrant it’s downright obsessive compulsive. The characters are fantastic and hilarious — I’m speaking specifically of Little Jacob and Brucie. Brucie especially. I rarely laugh at a video game, but some of Brucie’s lines are real unexpected jabs. But what I like best about the game is that it’s actually about something. It has a theme. All the stories and characters revolve around that theme: Chasing the American Dream.

Everyone is after it. Climbing up the ladder or going down by death or incarceration. Becoming Alpha. Lifelong friendships are split because of the money chase. Even the game’s talk radio constantly references the American Dream — protecting it by kicking illegals out, killing terr’rists, etc..

GTA 4 is an immigrant story about killing your way to the top. And the protagonist is just so damned polite and likable — everywhere you go in the game you’re met by really juicy conflicts. The whole thing is just so thoughtful. And “thoughtful” is rarely a world used to describe a video game.

Look, it’s like the opening of The Godfather — the guy says that he believes in America. But he’s asking for revenge. He wants the Godfather to put the screws to this guy that fucked his daughter. He knows that as beautiful as the American dream is, its reality is bloody. Principles will not rescue you. Justice is not clean and absolute, and the system can’t guarantee it. America was born in blood, from the moment Columbus set foot in the New World and decided that its inhabitants would make better slaves than equals. There are the takers and those that get took, like in Raisin in the Sun — the question is, which side will you be on?

That’s at the core of GTA 4, which is surprising and game-changing for a video game. The game means something, and it explores that core with a lot of humor, some ham-fistedness, but more than equal amounts of provocation.

And it’s fucking fun.

Thumping Claw 2008

May 2nd, 2008General0 comments

“Stand provides [Vivian] Bang with tour-de-force opportunities.”

Thumping Claw 2008: A Night of One Acts with pieces from
Carla Ching – Julia Cho – Michael Golamco – Lloyd Suh

What This Is: Last year a group called Thumping Claw put together a great show made up of one acts; this year they’re coming back with a brand new show written by some great writers and great friends of mine.

Proceeds go to charity so it’s a good cause. And it’s going to be an interesting night: A young woman is inundated with life in general; an old man’s family and world has changed around him; and a woman with Autism has to get her Star Trek script to Joss Whedon in an attempt to gain her freedom.

May 22nd thru June 21st: Preview May 22nd, Opening May 23rd; Thursdays-Saturdays at 8pm, Sundays at 3pm

Tickets: $22 at the door, $18 online; Discounts available for groups, seniors, students.

Tickets Available Online — Click here

The Actors’ Playpen: 1514 N Gardner Street, Los Angeles, CA 90046

For More Information: http://www.thumpingclaw.com – thumpingclaw@gmail.com